Spam poem

This is a spam poem, made by compiling together a few lines from the several spam comments from the previous post. (I translated the Chinese into English)

A girl’s masturbation beauty

How do you show it on the heart?

How to harvest the first of simple pleasures

When there are thousands of people praying

To items in the laws of stupid laws,

When you cannot determine the length of life,

But you can control the width of

Erotic sex porn, and babes

This is adult self-mapping

Banned in Taiwan

An erotic map that can guess

The true age of a woman

So clap your hands together

Because happiness is your heritage,

It should not depend on what you’ve done

Water is always the same,

When a human heart

can hold different conflicting things,

People will start becoming valuable.

soft and tired

I was trying to be a lawyer. I carried a telephone in my hand and it grew heavy in the afternoon. In my first court hearing there was a handcuffed prostitute sitting in one of the seats. I was young and my shoes were unpolished. I looked at the prostitute. My masters took me to McDonalds afterwards. They closed their eyes and said I am tired. They did not see the prostitute. Prostitutes are everywhere. My face was young and they commented on it. I touched my food. We need you to polish your shoes next time. I disappeared in a big car and someone called me. The afternoons were always heavy.

***

One day my mother disappeared. My sisters were very small and they looked at me. My brother played basketball in the afternoon and he was tired. I think you should do something. Anything. We walked to the beach and forgot to bring water. Everyone was thirsty and quiet. My mother came back three days later and buried a talisman made out of human hair and eggshells in the front yard. Your father will come back because of this. My brother screamed at her but no sound came out of his mouth. He was very tired.

***

There was a big flood. I was 7 and I ran away from some children as part of a game. I imagined that they would hurt me if they caught me. They had plastic baseball bats. I jumped into the flood and I did not know how to swim. My mother told me that there were many bad men in the local swimming pool and that they would touch me so I did not want to learn. I did not want to be touched. I held on to a broken table floating in the water. A nail jutting out from the table went through my hand. I wanted to cry but I was too tired. A boat stopped by me and a man asked me to swim towards him. I shook my head and he looked very tired.



Future Story


Something that involves tired people.

inside your mouth shining

I am choosing a birthday present for my little sister. I do not know what to buy and it is making me lose faith in myself.


Some people make you feel like squeezing them until they do something bad to you.

I was on the train and I dared myself to sit next to this stranger two seats behind me and ask him what was playing on his ipod. I thought that it was a good dare because he looked like he could punch me good if he wanted to. I didnt do it because I am chicken shit, but the good thing is it made my hands grow cold and I found out that something like this could scare me because I am so limited.

Some blogs I read give me comforting feelings.

A nightmare I could have: I meet the writer of a blog I like. We meet at a bar or something, and then we talk about ourselves and things we like to eat. I excuse myself and go to the toilet. I look at the mirror in the toilet and say "Shit." I want to ask the blog writer if he/she wants to sit at the nearest bus stop for fifteen minutes in complete silence. But I know he/she will look at me like I am a weird shithead. I want to slap the blog writer. I want to slap the blog writer and then run away saying "Shit. Shit."



Future Story

An old man wants to masturbate with his feet in the sea. He stands in the shore with the waves up to his ankles and begins to unbuckle his pants. A little child runs up to him and says "Hey." The old man says that he will give the child five dollars to go far far away. The child asks him what he is up to. The old man says that he is a scientist and that he needs to conduct a dangerous experiment so the child should go as far away as possible.

The child asks him if he knows any magic tricks since he is a scientist. The old man shows him a tattoo of a fish on his stomach and moves his stomach muscles so that it looks like the fish is swimming on his skin. The child runs away and says "Be careful old man."

The old man is tired so he lies down. He touches the fish and it hurts where he is touching it.

its raining so i am unable to say hello

I am left alone in the house. He has left for edinburgh.

I am sitting in his little office trying to find reasons not to go shopping.

a- its raining

b- i hate everyone today

c- i will figure out more in a minute.

When I was small I would fantasize about being crushed to death by my fathers books. That would teach him.



Future Story

A woman falls in love with a cactus plant. The cactus plant is a devout Catholic and insists that it will not touch her before they get married, so they plan a wedding in May. Every night before she goes to sleep she thinks about ways the cactus plant can fuck her without cutting her up. She wonders if there is a picture she can find on the internet to use as reference.

i will chase you down until your mouth opens wide enough.

Id like to say to a stranger "Hi, do you remember me?"


Ive never gone for proper therapy sessions. I was sent to "guidance counsellors" and some of my professors tried fixing me back in my scholastastic days. In my country, people who went to actual certified therapists were basically lepers without the leprosy. Depression was treated in the same vein as crazy. Nobody wanted to know you anymore if you were "getting help", and of course you would bring GREAT SHAME upon your family so it just wasnt an option for me, this therapy thing. When I told my sister that I was probably crazy she asked me what I wanted to do about it. I didnt really know at that point in time, so we let the crazy fester.


Now its grown into an invisible limb that spoons me soup every morning til I choke and smile.



Future Story


A little girl gets too tired to walk to school, she gets tired of walking, period, so she sits down underneath a tree and starts eating her tuna sandwich. The sandwich doesnt have mayonnaise or pickles. She eats the sandwich and wishes she had bought two sandwiches because she is in the mood to eat things. A bird of indeterminate species flies over her head and drops shit on her shoulder. It feels very heavy on her, like someone had slapped her in the face.

i will call you when the sky turns into a sea of milk, and all the babies turn away from their mothers.

My head hurts in a major way at this moment. I feel quite accomplished because I exercised again today. Its like an admission that I like living, that I want to live good. Even if its just on the outside Id like people to see that in me.


I am buying a new chair from ebay. I want something that used to belong to someone and it should smell like coffee and shampoo. No one is selling that right now but my boyfriend found a cream leather chair from the netherlands. It is selling for 0.99 p.

I want to write honestly.



Future Story


A man hugs a statue in the middle of a town. He tells a girl passing by that it is his wife, that his wife is inside the statue. The girl tells him that he should call someone about it. Someone with an axe, with a big machine that can smash things. That will solve your problem, she said.

The girl works in a small office and writes things on a notepad everyday. Today she draws a picture of the statue and the hands of the statue are pointing to itself, like "why me?".

hi jesus! whats up.

I woke up at 430 in the afternoon today.

I went through Facebook and found nothing that could keep me there. My friends do new things and everyday things and I think "youre still alive, and this is good. but I do not want to confirm this every five minutes. i still love you, forgive me."

I am getting a new laptop next week and it is a Great Event.


Future Story

A father carves a hole in his daughters chest so that she can breathe underwater. She jumps into the sea and she waves goodbye. They do not make long speeches. He is moving to another town because of his job as a software engineer. He also plays the saxophone.

Sometimes he watches videos of the deep sea on Youtube and thinks of his daughter living there with sharks and stinging jellyfish. He pictures her punching the sharks on the nose because she is a tough cookie. He sees her swimming like a drunk motorist and shouting at whales to get out of her way.

He screams I love you! into the sink every night after he brushes his teeth.